headup& smile.

sometimes life sucks so bad that we choose to escape reality by trying new drugs, getting shit-face intoxicated, being a whore and straight up push away everyone. Humanity is shitty and we know that because of everyone we’ve ever known. why is it such a big accomplishment that out of the hundreds of people you’ll ever meet in your life, probably only 20 will be genuine all your life. we pass and go through our lives with one set goal in mind: to make money. What if i want to be able to live comfortably and still be able to pursue my dreams? Should i give up luxury for the love of my hobby? Of course not, because reality is shitty and the only way we can get through living in this dreadful world is still believing that good people still exist. Anne Frank, after everything she was put through in the concentration camp wrote,”It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.” You kinda realize that people that have been through way shittier things and have seen way shittier people, that hey maybe my life isn’t so bad. I never know what i want and because of that my world crashed down. The thing i was always so sure of was suddenly so blurry in my vision. What do i really want? While looking for unimportant things, i lost grasp of the most important thing and now all i have left are regrets. I’ve come to realize that people change and things change. nothing in life is for sure and the people you trust may just betray you. There is so much uncertainty in this world and i just keep smiling through all the fucking bullshit but that don’t make it better. The tears keep rolling and the heart keeps hurting until you realize that your mom and dad are the only ones who will never lie to you. and even then, i fail to appreciate them. and You with that smirk on your face and your condescending tone; even after everything, you still pick at my flaws. Maybe things don’t work out and life feels empty as fuck sometimes for a special purpose that when one really great thing happens I’ll learn to enjoy every second of it. And once that really great person appears, I’ll be able to spot him right away. 

“Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.”